Fear of Flying

I love to watch birds soaring and diving, especially when there are
two who appear to be carried away with the mere pleasure of racing up
towards the heavens and tumbling back down over one another and then
spreading their wings wide and gliding.

I had the thrill of gliding once. We were towed behind a noisy little
single engine plane to just the right soaring height. I sat in the
front with a skywide view through the canopy. The pilot sat behind me.
I was unprepared for the sudden loud bang of the tow line being
released from the plane and snapping back to the fuselage of our
glider. But I was even less prepared for the amazing sense of
stillness, an almost palpable peace in the weightlessness. The pilot
gently dipped a wing setting us into a lazy spin giving a real
birdseye view of the rolling golden California hills beneath us. He
took us through a few more maneuvers expertly riding the air currents
feeling the wind lifting our wings. It was amazing! Then he told me
the controls were all mine. It turns out I was better at diving than
soaring and my 30 minute ride was cut to 15 as I gladly gave up
control and relied on the proficiency of my pilot to glide us in
safely.

It's amusing to some that my stint as a flight attendant a few years
left me afraid to fly. It was a 30,000 foot high ride over a tornado
that scared the wits out of me.

I often reference my favorite devotional 'Streams in the Desert'.
This day's encouragement is especially poignant for me so I pray it
will bless you as well:

"They will soar on wings like eagles." Isaiah 40:31 "There is a fable
about the way birds first got their wings. The story goes that
initially they were made without them. Then God made the wings, set
them down before the wingless birds, and said to them, 'Take up these
burdens and carry them'.

The birds had sweet voices for singing and lovely voices that
glistened in the sunshine but they could not soar in the air. When
asked tot take up the burdens that lay at their feet, they hesitated
at first. Yet soon they obeyed, picked up the wings with their beaks,
and set them on their shoulders to carry them. For a short time the load
seemed heavy and difficult to bear, but
soon, as they continued to carry the burden and to fold the wings over
their hearts, the wings grew attached to their little bodies.
They quickly discovered how to use them and were lifted by the wings
high into the air. The weights had become wings.
This is a parable for us. We are the wingless birds, and our
duties and tasks are the wings God uses to lift us up and carry us
heavenward. We look at our burdens and heavy loads, and try to run
from them, but if we will carry them and tie them to our hearts, they
will become wings. And on them we can then rise and soar to God.
There is no burden so heavy that when lifted cheerfully with love
in our hearts will not become a blessing to us. God intends for our
tasks to be our helpers; to refuse to bend our shoulders to carry a
load is to miss a new opportunity for growth." J. R. Miller "No matter
how overwhelming, any burden God has lovingly placed with His own
hands on our shoulders is a blessing" Frederick William Faber
----end quote---

When I was a child I was consumed with the desire to fly. My knees now
attest to the many times I jumped from low roofs and high swings in my
desire to capture that sense of flying.

This month I find myself faced with a set of wings before me . I tried
to run as I said "Lord, this set of wings is too big for me, and I
heard Him answer "Of course they are but you are not going to be
flying alone. I will there with you every beat."

Contrary to the popular bumper sticker, God is not my co-pilot. But I
aspire to be His. He's sure to overcome my fear of flying!

July 10, 2008

Crisis

In the counseling training manual I am studying for my work at the Crisis Pregnancy Center, there is a depiction of two characters making up the word for "crisis" in Chinese. The first represents "danger" and the second "opportunity", literally translated "Opportunity Riding On A Dangerous Wind."

Presently there are two crises facing me, one more threatening than the other, both beyond my control. Mulling them over, I came across a devotional discussing the bible passage in Matthew 14 where Peter steps out of his boat responding to Jesus' command to "come". Rather than reaching for Jesus’ hand, he looks at the wind and begins to sink.

"You will not prevail by measuring the waves or grow strong by gauging the wind". (Streams in the Desert)

I can see I have been assessing the dangers rather than seeing the opportunities they present. And I am realizing that the only way to seize an opportunity in one hand is to have Jesus holding my other hand.

As my pastor reminded me, "Through God we will do valiantly, and it is He who shall tread down our adversaries." Psalm 108:13